Raphael's MySpace Page
by thewarpedmind1
Summary: Raphael creates his MySpace page. This is my first fic ever. Please read and review! You will make an old lady very happy. lol


**Not mine don't own a thing.**

**Rated M for language. **

**I'm way too old for this but while talking with my son about the difference between the new and old show I decided I like the new show better and the new Raphael is just too cool. He has all the characteristics of the perfect Bad Boy. Don't think about what he is and just enjoy the character itself. My version of what he would look like if he was human. Long black hair pulled neatly into a ponytail and a goatee, bright green eyes with small flakes of gold, a silver scull ear ring in his left ear and several tattoos of snakes, tigers and a dragon with a sai through it's skull on his right forearm. **

**Thanks to Lacy for betaing this little piece of insanity and to the wonderful members of Godsmack (Love ya sully), Metallica and Tool for without their music I would have never thought of this and to my son who introduced me to these awesome bands and to his fiancé' for helping me create my own MySpace page. Most of these songs are on my own MySpace page. Please read this with a Brooklyn accent. I'm from the Deep South and just couldn't get it right. lol lol.**

**This story is dedicated to my son Joshua.**

Raphael's MySpace Page by Thewarpedmind1

"Yo dude, whatcha do'n?" Michelangelo asked as he barged into his brother's room.

"None of your fuckin' business, " Raphael snapped as he cursed his too large fingers and the too small keys.

"Sweet laptop. Where'd ya get it?" Michelangelo tried to get a better look over his brother's shoulder. "You're watching porn aren't ya and ya didn't even invite me? I'm hurt dude."

"Do you have to know everything, you nosey son of a bitch and NO! I ain't watchn' porn." (_yet). _He was really starting to get pissed off, not only at Michelangelo, but the damn keyboard too.

"Just remember we had the same mother ass hole." He glared at his brother. "You know what, fuck you Raph; you're about as much fun as Karai with a bad case of PMS." Michelangelo flipped his brother his version of the finger which is hard to do when you only have three fingers and slammed the door hard as he left the room, mumbling about what a dickhead his brother is. "Oh, well, Donny has all the best porn sites bookmarked. I'll go bug him."

"I thought that pain in the ass would never leave." Raphael had finally had enough of the small keys, snatched up his sai's and started pecking away. "This is gonna take for fucking ever, " He growled. "Ok, first I gotta sing up." He pecked in his e-mail address. .net and password. "Hmmmm." He stuck the sai between his teeth as he thought for a moment before picking Nightwatcher1 for his password. "Now to pick out a background. What was that site Casey told me had some cool shit on it." He stuck his sai in his mouth again and chewed on the tip as he thought. "Oh yeah, cool chasers .com." Slowly, he pecked the address in Google. He spent almost an hour browsing through many of the different layouts, amazed at all the cool shit he saw before finally settling on a really cool background of the Grim Reaper.

Next came all the other info. He started with Status. "Ok now, what hell do I put here and why does anybody need to know.' He leaned back in his chair, absently scratching his chin. Picking up his sai's he started pecking at the keys, cursing to himself about his lack of typing skills.

Status—Why do you want to know and what business is it of yours.

Mood-- Angry. Inserts red-faced mad emoticon next to it.

General— I'm 20 and male, is that general enough for ya.

Music---Godsmack and Metallica, these guys lyrics kick ass, they just fit me. Godsmack's first disk and Faceless are my mood music; Metallica just Kicks Ass and Tool is just out there.

Movies---All the Terminator's, all the Rambo's and all the Die Hard's.

TV—Don't care for much of what's on it pretty much blows, I mean what dumbass watches shit like Dancing with the stars. The History or The Military channels have cool shit on sometimes.

Books---The Art of War by Sun Tzu.

Heroes—My Sensei. I wish I could be more like him but I ain't got the patience for it.

"Ah shit, my fingers are startn' ta cramp and I need a beer." Raphael stood up, shook his hands and grabbed a beer from a cooler he kept hidden in the wall" Leo would have a baby if he knew I had this in here. Goody two shoes fucker would rat me out in a heart beat and if Michelangelo ever found em' I'd never have any. That little shit sure can put em' away." He pulled the tab and took a long pull before sitting back down to get started again.

Raphael cracked his knuckles, picked up his sai's and started pecking away at the keyboard. "Goddamnit," he cursed as the tip of his sai slipped off the keys again.

Details—My favorite thing is going all vigilante and bustn' bad guy heads. I love pissn' off my brothers, especially Leo. That tight ass wouldn't know fun if it hit him up-side the head. He's too busy tryn' to be perfect. I like to cruise the streets on my motorcycle sometimes, when the weather don't suck.

Status—Single and I don't see that ever changing. I learned a long time ago that someone like me ain't supposed to dream. I tried it once and a fat lot of good it did me.

Orientation—STRAIGHT!

Body type—Athletic

Ethnicity—Other

Zodiac Sign---Aries

Children—Hell No!!

Smoke/Drink—No/Yes

Education---Other

About Me—What the hell do you people want, my life story? See Details, that's all your gettn'.

Who I'd like to meet--- All 12 months of the year. Miss December can sit on Santa Raph's lap and tell him what she wants for Christmas. Ol' smilin' Bob ain't got nothin' on me.

Raphael grabbed another beer. He was ready to start on his playlist. Pecking project playlist into Google was harder than he thought as he kept hitting the o instead of p. Getting more and more pissed off, he finally killed off the beer and tossed the can at the wall in frustration. Picking up the sai's again he started again getting it right this time. Typing Godsmack in the search box he found just what he was looking for, his theme song.

_**Time Bomb **_

_I am in living hell, makes me wonder if I'm alive._

_Can't seem to bring myself to figure out why._

_I shove and I pull away to the things I call you everyday._

_I can't seem to break you down, but I know I'll come around._

_I feel your pins through my eyes, piercing me…_

_Lie down in all this piss; you drink it from me everyday._

_I live in a world of shit, been left here to die._

_Sometimes I realize my mind is meant to go away._

_Never have I seen your god, so why should I believe in faith._

_I feel your pins through my eyes, piercing me through the time._

_Another time bomb…_

_I am in living hell, makes me wonder if I'm alive._

_Can't seem to bring myself to figure out why._

_I shove and I pull away to the things that I call you everyday_

_I can't to break you down but I know I'll come around._

_I feel your pins through my eyes, piercing me through the time._

_I never find the time to find another fucking place._

_I'm a bad motherfucker who lives it everyday._

_You never look me now; you never look me in the face._

_I'm a time bomb, time bomb, baby._

_I can't find the time to find a place,_

_I'm a bad motherfucker who lives it everyday._

_You never look at me now; you never look me in the face._

_I'm a time bomb, time bomb, yeah!_

_What am I waiting for?_

_What am I waiting for?_

_I never find the time to find another fucking place,_

_I'm a bad motherfucker who lives it everyday._

_You never look at me now; you never look me in the face._

_I'm a time bomb, yeah!_

_Time bomb, time bomb, time bomb, time bomb, time bomb, time bomb_.

"Man I need another beer. He reached in the cooler for another cold one, then he started looking through the other Godsmack songs, until he got to his big brother song. He laughed to himself as he took another long pull off his beer. "Leo bro, every time I hear this I think of you. This ones for you Splinter Jr.

_**Whatever**_

_And I wonder, day to day, I don't like you anyway._

_I don't need your shit today; you're pathetic, in your own way._

_I feel for you…Better fucking go away._

_I will behave… You better fucking go away!_

_I'm doing the best I ever did._

_I'm doing the best that I can._

_I'm doing the best I ever did…_

_I don't need to fantasize. You are my pet all the time._

_I don't mind if you go blind._

_You get what you get until you're through with mine._

_I feel for you… Better fucking go away._

_I will behave… You better go away!_

_I'm doing the best I ever did._

_I'm doing the best that I can._

_I'm doing the best I ever did._

_Now go away!_

He searched through the other Godsmack tunes for his Shredder, Foot clan , Purple Dragons and all the other low-life ass holes, street punks, dealers and everyone else he could think of he fucking hates.

_**I Fucking Hate you**_

_For everything you do, I'd kike to swallow you and every day I'm gonna blame you._

_Even if you justify, every fucking bullshit lie. It only makes me want to break you._

_You pull me down and you crucify my name, you make me insane._

_It's broken now, don't ever look my way, don't even think I'm playn'._

'_Cause I fucking hate you, you're such a liar, I love to hate you, you're all same to me._

_When you repeatedly take advantage of me, the only thought I get of you sickens me._

_Everybody knows you're fake; you're everything I fucking hate and I'm everything you could never be._

_You pull me down and you crucify my name, you make me insane._

_It's broken now, don't ever look my way, don't even think I'm playn'._

'_Cause I fucking hate you, you're such a liar, I love to hate you you're all the same to me._

_Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you!!!!!_

Raphael took another swallow of his beer as he searched for his other song. "Ahhh, here it is. This is my anger talkn' to me. Maybe some day I'll figure out how to tone it down some but I'll never be able to turn it off because it's who **I Am."**

_**I Am**_

_I am your spoken truth; I am what lies in you, _

_I'm gonna make you shine in everything you do._

_I'm your darkest day; I'm here to help you see you can rely on me._

_Just consider me your friend, I am until the end. _

_Can I guarantee you life? I don't think I can._

_This isn't the life for me; this isn't the way I want to be._

_Let me tell you, death will come when I'm good and ready_.

_I am your piece of mind, confusing all your time._

_I'm running through your veins, I am your pain._

_I thought by now you'd know, I'll never let you go._

_It's time you recognize; I am the devil's eyes._

_Just consider me your friend, I am until the end._

_Can I guarantee you life? I don't think I can._

_This isn't the life for me; this isn't the way I want to be._

_Let me tell you, death will come when I'm good and ready._

_Death will come when I'm god and goddamn ready._

_Take me by the hand and let me show you what I am, _

_I'm taking control again, now I know I can,_

_Take me back to where it all began, 'Cause __**I am.**_

"I guess I'd better go take a leak before I have another beer." Raphael wasn't two steps out of his room before that grating voice hit him.

"And just where do you think you're going? You had better not be sneaking out." Leonardo snapped.

"Shit Leo, its gettn' to where a I can't take a piss without you being up my ass. I been potty trained for a long time and I think I can piss without telln' ya, so why don't ya go meditate or somethin,' pretend you gotta life and stay out of mine. And for your information if I want to go out I'll go out, I don't have to sneak anywhere." Raphael slammed the bathroom door in his brother's face.

He grabbed another beer and sat back down at his makeshift desk and once again began to search. After his confrontation with Leonardo he needed to calm down and he knew what he needed. "Why can't I find a little Serenity?"

_**Serenity**_

_**As I sit here and slowly close my eyes, I take another deep breath**_

_**And feel the wind pass through my body, I'm the one in your soul,**_

_**Reflecting inner light, protect the ones, who hold you,**_

_**Cradling your inner child.**_

_**I need serenity in a place where I can hide,**_

_**I need serenity, nothing changes, days go by.**_

_**Where do we go when we just don't know and**_

_**How do we relight the flame when it's cold? **_

_**Why do we dream when our thought mean nothing**_

_**And when will we learn to control.**_

_**Tragic visions slowly stole my life, tore away everything,**_

_**Cheating me out of my time, I'm the one, who loves you,**_

_**No matter wrong or right and every day I hold you,**_

_**I hold you with my inner child.**_

_**I need serenity, in a place where I can hide,**_

_**I need serenity, nothing changes, days go by.**_

_**Where do e go when we just don't know and **_

_**How do we relight the flame when it's cold?**_

_**Why do we dream when our thought mean nothing**_

_**And when will we learn to control.**_

_**Where do e go when we just don't know and**_

_**How do we relight the flame when it's cold?**_

_**Why do we dream when our thoughts mean nothing**_

_**And when will we learn to control.**_

_**I need serenity, I need serenity.**_

Raphael tossed another soldier on the ever growing pile of aluminum bodies as he started on another beer and with a good buzz working up, he started feeling reflective. So he decided to add stuff from the side of him no one saw but himself. "How 'bout some Metallica. I know just the right one."

_**The Outlaw Torn**_

_And now I wait my whole lifetime, for you._

_And now I wait my whole lifetime, for you._

_I ride the dirt I ride the tide, for you._

_I search the outside, search inside, for you._

_To take back what you left me, I know I'll burn to be._

_The one who seeks so I may find and now I wait my whole lifetime._

_Outlaw torn, outlaw torn and I'm torn._

_So now I wait my whole lifetime, for you._

_So now I wait my whole lifetime, for you_

_The more I search the more my need, for you._

_The more I bless the more I bleed, for you_

_You make me smash the clock and feel; I'd rather die behind the wheel._

_Time was never on my side, so now I wait my whole lifetime._

_Outlaw torn, outlaw torn and I'm torn._

_Hear me _

_And if I close my mind in fear, please pry it open._

_See me_

_And if my face becomes sincere…Beware._

_Hold me_

_And when I start to come undone, stitch me together._

_Save me_

_And when you see me strut, remind me of what left this outlaw torn._

"How come I can't get my anger under control, it's venom inside me, like a snake bite."

He typed Godsmack back in the playlist search box. "Shit, this is gettn' harder and harder," He cursed once again as the tip of his sai's slipped. " Fuckin' things just keep slippn' off the goddamn keys. Here's what I'm lookn' for."

_**Voodoo**_

_I'm not the one who's so far away, when I feel the snake bite enter my veins._

_Never did I wanna be here again and I don't remember why I came._

_Candles raise my desire, why I'm so far away. _

_No more meaning to my life, no more reason to stay._

_Freezing, feeling, breath in, breath in…_

_I'm coming back again…_

_I'm not the one who's so far away, when I feel the snake bite enter my veins._

_Never did I wanna be here again and I don't remember why I came._

_Hazing clouds rain on my head, empty thoughts fill my ears._

_Find my shade by the moonlight, why my thoughts aren't so clear._

_Demons dreaming, breath in, breath in…_

_I'm coming back again…_

_I'm not the one who's so far away, when I feel the snake bite enter my veins._

_Never did I want to feel this way again and I don't remember why I came._

_Voodoo, voodoo, voodoo, voodoo, voodoo, voodoo…_

_I'm not the one who's so far away.._

_I'm not the one who's so far away…_

_I'm not the one who's so far away…_

After seven beers he started feeling more and more down so he figured he'd splash some water on his face plus he had to take a leak again anyway. "I sure do hope Leo's off doing his thing because I ain't in the mood to see him again."

He managed to make it to the bathroom alone this time. He looked at his reflection in the mirror. "You're a piece of work dumbass." He shook his head and went back to finish his page.

Sitting back down with another beer, he thought about the face in the mirror and knew what was next on his list. "Man I feel Hollow."

_**Hollow**_

_One more step and I could fall away, if it happened would it matter_

_And I can't tell if I should go or stay, same old picture feels so hollow._

_How can anybody know what's best for me, another page I turn in shame_

_And my decisions brought me to my knees, I needed some to blame._

_I feel so hollow, I feel so hollow._

_Time to do what's best for me, I believe I can change._

_Once upon a time in broken dreams, reflections that I can't face._

_So hold your breath and make a wish for me, take me to a better place._

_Time always seems to be passing by, it never waits for me._

_If I could do it all one more time, I wouldn't change a thing._

_I feel so hollow, I feel so hollow._

_Time to do what's best for me I believe I can change._

Beer number nine was working its magic now and his mood was getting to the point of being down right depressing. "Shit, the way I feel right now I bet it's rainin' out. Wish I could take this thing out there in it. I do a lotta thinkin' watchin' it rain." Sai slipping out of his hands as the blood of dead aluminum soldiers he had consumed invaded his senses. "Son of a bitch, I know this song is here somewhere.' Finally he found it. "'bout fuckin' time."

_**One Rainy Day**_

_Oh man, I'm tired and lonely, again, why must it be._

_A man is drowning slowly and he can't keep above, gone way to deep._

_Open skies are falling, tears are coming down,_

_Like a drop of rain falls to the ocean and comes back around_

_One rainy day._

_Oh so many times I should have crawled when I went running by_

_And since then I've been left feeling traumatized, Raped and drained of an innocence_

_A gift we've lost over time and still I gaze through this one rainy day,_

_Alone with on one by my side_

_Open skies are falling, tears are coming down,_

_Like a drop of rain falls to the ocean and comes back around,_

_I swear I've given; I've given you all I can _

_Never will you ever make me feel this way again, on this one rainy day._

_Open skies are falling, tears are coming down,_

_Like a drop of rain falls to the ocean and comes back around._

_One rainy day, it's been just one rainy day._

"What the fuck am I doin' sittin' here ruinin' this good buzz I got goin' on by cryin' in my beer. If I wanted to do that I shoulda put Hank Williams on." He reached for beer number ten. "Shit, I ain't got but two more." He was starting to feel arrogant now. "Well one day I'm gonna meet the reaper when some street punk pops a cap in my ass. Ain't nobody got any honor anymore. It's easier to pull the trigger than it is to fight like men. This is what I want played when that time comes as long as they leave out the lame ass fuckin' ending."

_**10,000 Days**_

_Listen to the tales and romanticize how we follow the path of the hero._

_Boast about the day when the rivers overrun, how we'll rise to the height of our halo._

_Listen to the tales as we all rationalize, our way to the arms of the savior._

_Feigning all the trails and tribulations, none of us have actually been there_

_Not like you…._

_Ignorant fibbers in the congregation, gather around spewing sympathy, spare me …_

_None of them can even hold a candle up to you, blinded by hypocrites won't see_

_But enough about the collective Judas, who could deny you were the one who_

_Illuminated your little piece of the divine and this little light the gift you passed_

_On to me, I'm gonna let it shine to guide you safely on your way home. Your way home…_

_Oh, what are you gonna do when the lights go down, without you to guide them all to Zion_

_What are you gonna do when the rivers overrun other then tremble incessantly._

_High is the way but all eyes are upon the ground. You are the light and the way,_

_They'll only read about. I only pray heaven knows when to lift you out._

_10,000 days in the fire is long enough. You're going home…_

_You're the only one who can hold you head up high, shake your fist at the gate,_

"_I've come home now." Fetch me the spirit the son and the father tell them_

_Their pillar of faith has ascended. "It's time now, my time now, give me my, give me my wings."_

_You are the light and the way they'll only read about._

_Set in my ways and my arrogance, burden of proof tossed upon the believers,_

_You are my witness, my eyes and my evidence._

"Man I'm finally done and I mean I'm really done. I'm about fucked up." Raphael shut down the computer, sat down on his bed, picked his cell then hit speed dial 5, and waited for the voice on the other end.

"Hey Raph, what's up?"

"Hi April, I just wanted to tell ya I'd be over tomorrow to start workin' off what I owe ya for the computer." He slurred his words.

"Raph, are you drunk?"

"Uh, maybe a little."

"I'd say maybe more that just a little. I'd say a lot. Just come when you're ready. Those crates aren't going anywhere."

"You're a good friend April, you know that. A good friend."

"Good night Raph. Go pass out now. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Night." He fell over on the bed and passed out.


End file.
